I started this blog as a way for family and friends to keep up on my life overseas. It has turned out that I have enjoyed writing this blog as much as many people have enjoyed reading it. It has become almost a therapy for me. I had no intentions of continuing bonvoyoz after my journey ended, but I have come to the oh so symbolic realization that the journey never ends. LIfe is one big journey, and although trips overseas, marriage, kids, mortgages, pets, plants, and other adventures may seem like the only journeys we take, I have come to realize that everyday is a journey in and of itself. I know, I know, I sound like some sort of spiritual, pot smoking, dread wearing, patchouli loving hippie, but its true. My journey is not over, and getting back into the "real" world of grad school, work, apt, car, health insurance, etc is my current journey. Since writing has become my new therapy, I have decided to let bonvoyoz live on. It may not be as exciting as it once was, with waterfalls, temples, meeting people of every nationality, and smoking god knows what on boat trips, but it will be my therapy none the less.
So, getting back to the states was in one word, weird. I landed in LA on Monday July 20th, and was instantly reminded of why I left LA years ago. Traffic. No need to say anymore. Traffic sucks. I had an amazing time bonding with my brother, his girlfriend and his dog and cat. We went to a CD release party of a band called "billy boy on poison", a free concert in the park, got my tattoo covered up with a kick ass koi fish, and overall had a great time. I caught up with friends who still live in LA, and got 11 inches of my hair cut off and donated it to locks of love. So basically with the new tatt, and new hair, I look completely different than when i left. This is perfectly fitting, because I am a completely different person. I am completely different in all completely good ways. As I said to my friend kate, in a joking manner (sort of joking) I am wayyy cooler than when I left. I hope I don't lose my relaxing, chilled out, go with the flow, open minded, easy going attitude any time soon.
After LA, I went to San Fran for a few days, and then hit up Colorado for a family reunion. It was wonderful to see even more family. I had some great bonding sessions with my cousins, and a gorgeous hike in the rockies. I always forget how you can really feel the altitude up there. I felt like my lungs were going to collapse at one point, and then I remembered that I am so horrifically out of shape, its probably not the lack of oxygen, but rather the excess of food, and booze I have overly consumed the last year. Shit, I think I need a detox.
I finally got back to the dirty jerz about a week ago. I found an Apt my first day here, and I am pretty excited about it. I will be living with a girl named Lisa. She is a friend of a friend, and she seems pretty chill, and sweet. So lets keep our fingers crossed she is actually a neat neat chick! I start classes in a few weeks, and will be meeting my academic advisor who has so far been completely useless. Lets hope she shapes up, or maybe ill be shipping out! (Side note: I think one day I will try to write a blog with as many cliches as possible, I think I would do a phenomenal job). I have spent a lot of time with my friends in Hoboken. Its been wonderful to see familiar faces, but it is truly shocking how nothing changes. Everyone is basically doing the same thing, hanging with the same people, have the same personalities, with the same dramas. How is it possible that I have changed so much, and the people around me have changed so little. hmmm... time to contemplate... OH YEAH, its because i went on the journey of a freaking lifetime!
My journey is continuing. It may not be the same journey I set out on nine months ago, but it is sill going on, and Im still going to write and have self induced therapy. Please continue to read, hopefully I wont bore you.
Sunday, August 9, 2009
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
blogs lost and found
Here are two blogs I wrote, but forgot to put online. They are a bit dated now, but I figured I would share anyhow. Enjoy my lost and found blogs.
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I leave in only a few days, and I am not sure what to think about it all. It doesn’t help that I am totally PMS’ing so that throws any logical emotional response right out the window. It is Thursday today, but by the time I get this post online it will be Friday, which means in 3 days I am on my first flight to Sydney. I have decided to take the last flight out of Adelaide on Sunday night, and just stay in the airport overnight since my flight to Auckland New Zealand is at 6:10 am Monday morning. It is going to be one LONG day/s of traveling.
On Sunday last weekend my friends planned a going away surprise for me. Up until Saturday night all I knew is that I had to be outside our friend Nick and Tom’s apt at 8:45 am, and to dress warmly. Unfortunately a facebook status update reading “I can’t wait for the Barossa Valley wine tour tomorrow” spoiled the surprise. Good job Tom! No worries however, I still had an amazing time. My friend Tamara organized the whole thing, and 12 of us got on a mini bus at 9 am and took the hour or so drive up to Barossa, and went to 5 different wineries. We started the day at Jacobs Creek, then made our way to Peter Leimans, Penfolds, Wolf Blass, and ended the day at Yulumba. Great wine, great company, great laughs, great day. Thanks Mara… you made me feel like I will be missed, and you can bet I will miss you all.
This week has been comprised pretty much of just tying up loose ends here. I had to file a tax return for 2009 and 2010, buy multiple plane tix, get a rental car for LA, buy some last minute mementos etc. I still cant believe that my trip is coming to an end. I am really quite emotional about it all. I cant believe how fast the last 8 months have gone. I am not ready to leave Australia, but I guess all good things must come to an end. Life here really is quite easy, and I will most certainly be back to this side of the world sooner rather than later.
My friend Jess left for Noosa today for a family vacation, and Andrew and 3 other guys leave for Vietnam tomorrow, so it sucks that this isn’t a band-aide goodbye; quick and painless. I have to say goodbye to people in spurts. I hate goodbyes.
Anyhow, time to wrap up. I am excited to see my friends and family, yet simultaneously I am devastated about leaving. I guess having mixed emotions about all of this is only natural.
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I am writing this from the Auckland airport in New Zealand looking out an airport window onto the tarmac. Behind the gray concrete slab occupied by larger than life planes are beautiful green mountains and hills. This makes me wish I could stay longer and see New Zealand for all the beauty it has to offer. Unfortunately this go around I will have to accept that my airport view is all I can get.
I left Adelaide on Sunday night after I fairly uneventful weekend. Friday night Andrew and the boys left for Vietnam. Although it was a sad goodbye, I was proud that I didn’t shed any tears. I am 100% positive that I will see them all again, its just a matter of when. After the boys got in a cab to the airport to start their 3 week holiday, my friend Luke dropped me off back home. I packed, and relaxed and had an early night. Saturday morning I went to the last of the amateur footy games that took up most of my Saturdays since being in Adelaide. Although Andrew, and Nick were off to Vietnam and not playing, my friend Cormac and Scotty were still tearing it up on the field. Cormacs girlfriend and I went to the game, and to be honest I’m glad to know that my next few Saturdays will not be taken up by amateur Australia Rules Football. Don’t get me wrong, I have learned to like the game and enjoy watching it, but sitting outside in cold, rainy weather watching the boys be all testosteroney and hit each other trying to prove they have bigger cojones than their counterparts is something I will take a miss on for the next few weeks. I think I should win roommate of the year award.
Anyhow, Saturday night I went to Tamara and Dana’s place where we drank lots of cheap champagne, ate a delicious 4 course dinner that Mara made, and watched “Beaches”. How fitting. A few people asked if I wanted to have a “bender” of a night since it was my last weekend in Australia, but all I wanted to do was spend time with the people that I grew close to, not forget the events of a massive night with people I don’t care about.
Sunday after finishing packing, and spending 2 hours ripping open my suitcase in pursuit of my lost passport (note to self don’t pack while drinking wine). Luke came over and we watched (yes you guessed it) Footy. I think the boys in Andrews group of friends have come to respect my opinion on different situations and especially when it comes to girls. I think they appreciate that I have an outsiders perspective and will give it to them straight. This no bullshit, say it like it is, attitude has gotten me into trouble in the past, however I now think this is more of an asset than a downfall. Anyhow, Luke, Andrew, and the other guys, ask me advice on a pretty regular basis. I’m glad I was able to make my way into their little dirty boys social club, but I do think that they sometimes forgot that I was a girl, and I wasn’t actually one of the boys. This is fine by me though, I like being one of the guys, as long as I don’t keep myself in that “friend” category forever.
Anyhow, I have digressed. Tamara and Dana picked me up to drive me to the airport on Sunday night and after a sad goodbye (still held back the tears) I boarded a fairly painless flight to Sydney. My plan all along was to take the last flight to Sydney sleep in the airport over night and check in for my first leg to New Zealand at about 4 am. Well little did I know they actually close the airport down every night from 12-4am. Awesome. What now?? All the airport guards heard everyone who wants to sleep there overnight into a room near the subway entrance. When I got kicked out of my cozy corner and cattle hearded into this area I asked if it was safe, their response. “(slight giggle) umm… yeah, you are on CC TV all night”. Hmmm great. CC tv, that’ll for sure keep me safe!! (sarcasm). Oh well, I had no other options so I followed another girl into this area, and I was pleasantly surprised to find about 10 other backpackers all cozzied up on an uncomfortable airport chair. I fell asleep a few times, but didn’t get more than maybe a total of an hours rest. At 4 am we were allowed back into the airport. A quick check in, flew through security, and bam, was on my first flight to NZ. I literally got on the plane, and passed out cold. I woke up to the flight attendant giving me my vegetarian breakfast, groggy and confused. I managed to eat the veggie bfast and pass out again immediately, only to be woken again by my ears hurting because we were landing. Sweet. I love flights like that. I hope my 13 hour flight to LA is similar. Although they are playing “Confessions of a Shopaholic” so I guess I have to stay up for a bit! ☺ (Completely serious, I cant wait to watch it).
I am really sad that I am heading home. I am not ready, and the more I think about it the more I just want to stay. While attempting to sleep in the freezing noisy uncomfortable airport in Sydney I kept just thinking, “what if I stay??” well I didn’t stay, and I’m sure Ill look back in one years time crazed with grad school and working, and think, why the fuck didn’t I stay. It was so easy there. I do think if I had a “real” job with a car I would have easily stayed in Australia until my VISA expired. Oh well, I’m still young. I can (and will) come back. I will come see NZ, and not just see the tarmac with luggage carts whizzing over the concrete from terminal to plane. I will walk in the mountains that I can see in the distance, and I will re-visit the life long friends I have made. I feel like I just left yesterday, I cant believe it has been 8 months.
It is now time to board my 3rd plane in the last 12 hours. The final leg to the good ol’ US of A.
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I leave in only a few days, and I am not sure what to think about it all. It doesn’t help that I am totally PMS’ing so that throws any logical emotional response right out the window. It is Thursday today, but by the time I get this post online it will be Friday, which means in 3 days I am on my first flight to Sydney. I have decided to take the last flight out of Adelaide on Sunday night, and just stay in the airport overnight since my flight to Auckland New Zealand is at 6:10 am Monday morning. It is going to be one LONG day/s of traveling.
On Sunday last weekend my friends planned a going away surprise for me. Up until Saturday night all I knew is that I had to be outside our friend Nick and Tom’s apt at 8:45 am, and to dress warmly. Unfortunately a facebook status update reading “I can’t wait for the Barossa Valley wine tour tomorrow” spoiled the surprise. Good job Tom! No worries however, I still had an amazing time. My friend Tamara organized the whole thing, and 12 of us got on a mini bus at 9 am and took the hour or so drive up to Barossa, and went to 5 different wineries. We started the day at Jacobs Creek, then made our way to Peter Leimans, Penfolds, Wolf Blass, and ended the day at Yulumba. Great wine, great company, great laughs, great day. Thanks Mara… you made me feel like I will be missed, and you can bet I will miss you all.
This week has been comprised pretty much of just tying up loose ends here. I had to file a tax return for 2009 and 2010, buy multiple plane tix, get a rental car for LA, buy some last minute mementos etc. I still cant believe that my trip is coming to an end. I am really quite emotional about it all. I cant believe how fast the last 8 months have gone. I am not ready to leave Australia, but I guess all good things must come to an end. Life here really is quite easy, and I will most certainly be back to this side of the world sooner rather than later.
My friend Jess left for Noosa today for a family vacation, and Andrew and 3 other guys leave for Vietnam tomorrow, so it sucks that this isn’t a band-aide goodbye; quick and painless. I have to say goodbye to people in spurts. I hate goodbyes.
Anyhow, time to wrap up. I am excited to see my friends and family, yet simultaneously I am devastated about leaving. I guess having mixed emotions about all of this is only natural.
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I am writing this from the Auckland airport in New Zealand looking out an airport window onto the tarmac. Behind the gray concrete slab occupied by larger than life planes are beautiful green mountains and hills. This makes me wish I could stay longer and see New Zealand for all the beauty it has to offer. Unfortunately this go around I will have to accept that my airport view is all I can get.
I left Adelaide on Sunday night after I fairly uneventful weekend. Friday night Andrew and the boys left for Vietnam. Although it was a sad goodbye, I was proud that I didn’t shed any tears. I am 100% positive that I will see them all again, its just a matter of when. After the boys got in a cab to the airport to start their 3 week holiday, my friend Luke dropped me off back home. I packed, and relaxed and had an early night. Saturday morning I went to the last of the amateur footy games that took up most of my Saturdays since being in Adelaide. Although Andrew, and Nick were off to Vietnam and not playing, my friend Cormac and Scotty were still tearing it up on the field. Cormacs girlfriend and I went to the game, and to be honest I’m glad to know that my next few Saturdays will not be taken up by amateur Australia Rules Football. Don’t get me wrong, I have learned to like the game and enjoy watching it, but sitting outside in cold, rainy weather watching the boys be all testosteroney and hit each other trying to prove they have bigger cojones than their counterparts is something I will take a miss on for the next few weeks. I think I should win roommate of the year award.
Anyhow, Saturday night I went to Tamara and Dana’s place where we drank lots of cheap champagne, ate a delicious 4 course dinner that Mara made, and watched “Beaches”. How fitting. A few people asked if I wanted to have a “bender” of a night since it was my last weekend in Australia, but all I wanted to do was spend time with the people that I grew close to, not forget the events of a massive night with people I don’t care about.
Sunday after finishing packing, and spending 2 hours ripping open my suitcase in pursuit of my lost passport (note to self don’t pack while drinking wine). Luke came over and we watched (yes you guessed it) Footy. I think the boys in Andrews group of friends have come to respect my opinion on different situations and especially when it comes to girls. I think they appreciate that I have an outsiders perspective and will give it to them straight. This no bullshit, say it like it is, attitude has gotten me into trouble in the past, however I now think this is more of an asset than a downfall. Anyhow, Luke, Andrew, and the other guys, ask me advice on a pretty regular basis. I’m glad I was able to make my way into their little dirty boys social club, but I do think that they sometimes forgot that I was a girl, and I wasn’t actually one of the boys. This is fine by me though, I like being one of the guys, as long as I don’t keep myself in that “friend” category forever.
Anyhow, I have digressed. Tamara and Dana picked me up to drive me to the airport on Sunday night and after a sad goodbye (still held back the tears) I boarded a fairly painless flight to Sydney. My plan all along was to take the last flight to Sydney sleep in the airport over night and check in for my first leg to New Zealand at about 4 am. Well little did I know they actually close the airport down every night from 12-4am. Awesome. What now?? All the airport guards heard everyone who wants to sleep there overnight into a room near the subway entrance. When I got kicked out of my cozy corner and cattle hearded into this area I asked if it was safe, their response. “(slight giggle) umm… yeah, you are on CC TV all night”. Hmmm great. CC tv, that’ll for sure keep me safe!! (sarcasm). Oh well, I had no other options so I followed another girl into this area, and I was pleasantly surprised to find about 10 other backpackers all cozzied up on an uncomfortable airport chair. I fell asleep a few times, but didn’t get more than maybe a total of an hours rest. At 4 am we were allowed back into the airport. A quick check in, flew through security, and bam, was on my first flight to NZ. I literally got on the plane, and passed out cold. I woke up to the flight attendant giving me my vegetarian breakfast, groggy and confused. I managed to eat the veggie bfast and pass out again immediately, only to be woken again by my ears hurting because we were landing. Sweet. I love flights like that. I hope my 13 hour flight to LA is similar. Although they are playing “Confessions of a Shopaholic” so I guess I have to stay up for a bit! ☺ (Completely serious, I cant wait to watch it).
I am really sad that I am heading home. I am not ready, and the more I think about it the more I just want to stay. While attempting to sleep in the freezing noisy uncomfortable airport in Sydney I kept just thinking, “what if I stay??” well I didn’t stay, and I’m sure Ill look back in one years time crazed with grad school and working, and think, why the fuck didn’t I stay. It was so easy there. I do think if I had a “real” job with a car I would have easily stayed in Australia until my VISA expired. Oh well, I’m still young. I can (and will) come back. I will come see NZ, and not just see the tarmac with luggage carts whizzing over the concrete from terminal to plane. I will walk in the mountains that I can see in the distance, and I will re-visit the life long friends I have made. I feel like I just left yesterday, I cant believe it has been 8 months.
It is now time to board my 3rd plane in the last 12 hours. The final leg to the good ol’ US of A.
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
I'm coming home
In just under two weeks from today, I will be boarding a plane to Los Angeles. Holy Shit Johnny 5, that is so soon. Insane. I can’t believe it is finally time for me to leave. I truly do think that if I had a legitimate job here I may have stayed a lot longer. The fact that I hated where I worked did not help the situation one iota.
I put my notice in a week ago that I was leaving in order to give them two weeks notice, which I thought was the respectful, responsible thing to do. However since the restaurant is filled entirely of wankers (minus a few good eggs here and there) they did not schedule me for a single shift for the next two weeks. Fine by me alehouse. I hate you and your schnitzels anyway.
Anyhow, A little about what I have been occupying my time with the last few weeks. I have actually kept quite busy, and have gotten a lot closer to some of the girls here. Jess, a friend of Andrew’s from high-school, and I have become much better friends. Jess’s mom introduced us to a meditation class on Monday nights. Basically it is one hour long, and it is at a place called the “Budha House”. It is very cool, and very relaxing, and something I could see myself really enjoying and making it part of my lifestyle. The hour actually went by quite quickly considering all we were doing was breathing deeply. Jess’s mom, Sue, also introduced us to a wine tasting on Thursday nights. It is from 5-7 pm and it is at a bar called the “Wine Underground”. Each week a different winery from the area, whether it be the Barossa Valley, or MclarenVale, or Adelaide Hills, comes to the bar, and gives samples of their wines for 2 hours, and little gourmet finger food is served. It was awesome. We went last week for the first time, and I think it is a weekly occurrence for me for the remainder of my time here (only two Thursdays to go!!! EEK). Hmm…what else. I guess not too too much. It is still pretty cold here so hopefully Ill be able to catch the tail end of summer back home.
I still have a few things here I would like to do before I take off for good. I would like to see the Barossa Valley, as well as take a drive up into the Adelaide Hills. I have two full weeks to do this so hopefully ill be able to convince someone to come with me.
Next weekend, I was told by my friends here that they are planning something for Sunday, Sarah’s Sunday of Fun, is what it is labeled, I have no idea what is planned, but my friend Tamara said she took Monday off of work, so I am thinking things may get messy. Hah. Can’t wait. I am definitely looking forward to that.
I still have total mixed feelings about leaving. As I said at the start of this, I think if I had a legit job here, and a car, I would love living here. However it is difficult only working in a place that I did not enjoy. Oh well. At the moment plane tix are incredibly cheap. I found one today that was a round trip ticket for $500. So maybe if they stay this way, which is very unlikely, I’ll come back and visit in the near future. I think the main reason I am sad to go is simply because of all the amazing people I have met here. I will miss them more than they know. I am really excited to see everyone back home, but I think today was the first day it kicked in that I am actually leaving in two weeks. I think today was the first day that I got really sad about it as well.
I would like to leave you all with an inspiring statement from one of the fabulous people that I love working with so much (sarcasm if you cant tell).
Me: So Matt, do you work anywhere else??
Matt: nope just here.
Me: Oh, so are you studying or something.
Matt: STUDY??? Are you stupid??? I’m no idiot. My idea of fun is not to get a big bill at the end of a school year. Ill never study!
Me: (quiet but thinking to myself: 1- Matt you are a HUGE idiot, and your English language skills are shocking. 2- You reek of terrible BO, take a shower. 3- I’m glad your idea of fun is working in a shit restaurant for the rest of your life.)
I found out later in the day that this douche bag of an individual is actually engaged. I fear for all of human race if he procreates. Although, it also gives me hope that if this guy can find someone to share his life of misery, I too will find someone someday. Hah.
Ta Ta for now.
I put my notice in a week ago that I was leaving in order to give them two weeks notice, which I thought was the respectful, responsible thing to do. However since the restaurant is filled entirely of wankers (minus a few good eggs here and there) they did not schedule me for a single shift for the next two weeks. Fine by me alehouse. I hate you and your schnitzels anyway.
Anyhow, A little about what I have been occupying my time with the last few weeks. I have actually kept quite busy, and have gotten a lot closer to some of the girls here. Jess, a friend of Andrew’s from high-school, and I have become much better friends. Jess’s mom introduced us to a meditation class on Monday nights. Basically it is one hour long, and it is at a place called the “Budha House”. It is very cool, and very relaxing, and something I could see myself really enjoying and making it part of my lifestyle. The hour actually went by quite quickly considering all we were doing was breathing deeply. Jess’s mom, Sue, also introduced us to a wine tasting on Thursday nights. It is from 5-7 pm and it is at a bar called the “Wine Underground”. Each week a different winery from the area, whether it be the Barossa Valley, or MclarenVale, or Adelaide Hills, comes to the bar, and gives samples of their wines for 2 hours, and little gourmet finger food is served. It was awesome. We went last week for the first time, and I think it is a weekly occurrence for me for the remainder of my time here (only two Thursdays to go!!! EEK). Hmm…what else. I guess not too too much. It is still pretty cold here so hopefully Ill be able to catch the tail end of summer back home.
I still have a few things here I would like to do before I take off for good. I would like to see the Barossa Valley, as well as take a drive up into the Adelaide Hills. I have two full weeks to do this so hopefully ill be able to convince someone to come with me.
Next weekend, I was told by my friends here that they are planning something for Sunday, Sarah’s Sunday of Fun, is what it is labeled, I have no idea what is planned, but my friend Tamara said she took Monday off of work, so I am thinking things may get messy. Hah. Can’t wait. I am definitely looking forward to that.
I still have total mixed feelings about leaving. As I said at the start of this, I think if I had a legit job here, and a car, I would love living here. However it is difficult only working in a place that I did not enjoy. Oh well. At the moment plane tix are incredibly cheap. I found one today that was a round trip ticket for $500. So maybe if they stay this way, which is very unlikely, I’ll come back and visit in the near future. I think the main reason I am sad to go is simply because of all the amazing people I have met here. I will miss them more than they know. I am really excited to see everyone back home, but I think today was the first day it kicked in that I am actually leaving in two weeks. I think today was the first day that I got really sad about it as well.
I would like to leave you all with an inspiring statement from one of the fabulous people that I love working with so much (sarcasm if you cant tell).
Me: So Matt, do you work anywhere else??
Matt: nope just here.
Me: Oh, so are you studying or something.
Matt: STUDY??? Are you stupid??? I’m no idiot. My idea of fun is not to get a big bill at the end of a school year. Ill never study!
Me: (quiet but thinking to myself: 1- Matt you are a HUGE idiot, and your English language skills are shocking. 2- You reek of terrible BO, take a shower. 3- I’m glad your idea of fun is working in a shit restaurant for the rest of your life.)
I found out later in the day that this douche bag of an individual is actually engaged. I fear for all of human race if he procreates. Although, it also gives me hope that if this guy can find someone to share his life of misery, I too will find someone someday. Hah.
Ta Ta for now.
Monday, June 15, 2009
im staying...at least for now
As most of you know, I have been debating for quite a while now whether I should come home or not. When I initially purchased my ticket to Australia I bought a round trip ticket simply because it was cheaper than a one way flight. I had no intentions of using the second half of the ticket. However, seeing as how I was quite homesick, I contemplated, debated, had sleepless nights and lots of tears over the decision to stay or go. I FINALLY made my decision yesterday and that decision is to stay for another 5 weeks and then Ill be at that crossroad again.
Basically the reason why this decision is so hard is the following:
1- I hate my job here. I am working in a restaurant/bar with a bunch of wankers. If you are unaware of what a wanker is, please refer to douchbag, tool, fuckwit, etc... . Let me give you examples.
The head chef, Trevor, is probably early 40’s, and like most head chef’s he thinks he is the fucking king of the world. Really though, he makes schnitzels for a living. Get over yourself! You make SCHNITZELS!! Now, to paint a picture of these schnitzels, they are the size of approximately 2 dinner plates. Enormous pieces of deep friend meat with various gravy’s thrown on top. They look so incredibly unappetizing it makes me never want to eat meat again. You Trevor, or not only a huge tool, but you have single handedly made me yearn for veggies like never before. You and your schnitzel loving self can suck it. Number 2 in command, Johnny, is actually very nice and has a pleasant demeanor, he is not conceded like Schnitzel king Trevor, yet Johnny is a huge tool by what he says. On my first introduction to him, he says, “Oh you travel, have you been to Bali?” My response is “yes”. Johnny “Did you know the dishwasher Jared fucked a Balinese hooker for 20 bucks”. Exact words, I kid you not. This is the first conversation I had with Johnny on my very first day. I was shocked at this comment, and a few days later after a few more tool-ish comments I told Johnny he needs to work on that sensor that triggers the brain saying, maybe I shouldn’t say this out loud.
Not only do I not enjoy the people who work at the restaurant, but I get hardly any hours. I have been working about 10 hours a week. I am not saving any money, and can barely afford rent each week.
2-It is winter here. It is cold. This is relative of course. Cold for Australia is like a nice spring in the states. However it is approaching summer at home, and I miss the sunshine.
3-I am applying to graduate schools. If I get in, I want some time to settle before I have to start school in Sept. However with all the complications of getting a complete application into the schools, the possibility of this is looking less and less likely.
4- I miss my friends and family.
However, with all this combined, and as my friend Tom said. "American will always be there". I have my working visa to Australia now, and I only get it once in my life. I might as well stay here, until I know for certain about graduate school, and then go from there. So I have officially moved my ticket back to July 20th. That is 5 weeks from yesterday. I am currently looking for a job that will stimulate me a bit more, and give me more money and hours. If for some miraculous reason I find this job and I make a lot more money I may decide to stay past July 20th, otherwise assuming I get into grad school, I will most likely head home at this point.
I hope this was the right decision. I think it is. I think ill be happy I am staying for a bit longer. I guess I shall just have to wait and find out.
Basically the reason why this decision is so hard is the following:
1- I hate my job here. I am working in a restaurant/bar with a bunch of wankers. If you are unaware of what a wanker is, please refer to douchbag, tool, fuckwit, etc... . Let me give you examples.
The head chef, Trevor, is probably early 40’s, and like most head chef’s he thinks he is the fucking king of the world. Really though, he makes schnitzels for a living. Get over yourself! You make SCHNITZELS!! Now, to paint a picture of these schnitzels, they are the size of approximately 2 dinner plates. Enormous pieces of deep friend meat with various gravy’s thrown on top. They look so incredibly unappetizing it makes me never want to eat meat again. You Trevor, or not only a huge tool, but you have single handedly made me yearn for veggies like never before. You and your schnitzel loving self can suck it. Number 2 in command, Johnny, is actually very nice and has a pleasant demeanor, he is not conceded like Schnitzel king Trevor, yet Johnny is a huge tool by what he says. On my first introduction to him, he says, “Oh you travel, have you been to Bali?” My response is “yes”. Johnny “Did you know the dishwasher Jared fucked a Balinese hooker for 20 bucks”. Exact words, I kid you not. This is the first conversation I had with Johnny on my very first day. I was shocked at this comment, and a few days later after a few more tool-ish comments I told Johnny he needs to work on that sensor that triggers the brain saying, maybe I shouldn’t say this out loud.
Not only do I not enjoy the people who work at the restaurant, but I get hardly any hours. I have been working about 10 hours a week. I am not saving any money, and can barely afford rent each week.
2-It is winter here. It is cold. This is relative of course. Cold for Australia is like a nice spring in the states. However it is approaching summer at home, and I miss the sunshine.
3-I am applying to graduate schools. If I get in, I want some time to settle before I have to start school in Sept. However with all the complications of getting a complete application into the schools, the possibility of this is looking less and less likely.
4- I miss my friends and family.
However, with all this combined, and as my friend Tom said. "American will always be there". I have my working visa to Australia now, and I only get it once in my life. I might as well stay here, until I know for certain about graduate school, and then go from there. So I have officially moved my ticket back to July 20th. That is 5 weeks from yesterday. I am currently looking for a job that will stimulate me a bit more, and give me more money and hours. If for some miraculous reason I find this job and I make a lot more money I may decide to stay past July 20th, otherwise assuming I get into grad school, I will most likely head home at this point.
I hope this was the right decision. I think it is. I think ill be happy I am staying for a bit longer. I guess I shall just have to wait and find out.
Monday, May 18, 2009
looking for the same shade of green everywhere in the world
Forethought: Sorry Dad, I know you asked for another light hearted, funny blog, but unfortunately I don’t have it in me just yet.
The last time I wrote, I spoke about home. I spoke of how, for the time being, I was finally home. I spoke about how I was so glad to have stopped moving and to be settled. I think the saying that applies best to my life at this exact moment is “the grass is always greener”. You always want what you don’t have. It’s actually quite annoying don’t you think?
Now that I am settled, I miss home. This time around I am qualifying home as the USA, NYC, Hoboken, NH, Maine, etc. Now that I have stopped moving, I have all the time in the world to think about the pleasures of home. When I was moving around every few days, I was far too busy to have time to think about anything more than what city I would be in next and how I was getting there, never-mind to think about home. There was no time to think about my family, my friends, and what was going on in their lives. Now that I have been in Adelaide for what is approaching 3 weeks on Thursday, I have felt very, very home sick.
I think this feeling of missing home is only increased by the fact that many of my friends have had life altering things happen in the last few weeks. One friend from home got married a few weeks ago, and I missed her wedding, one friend got engaged last weekend, one friend had her company transfer her to London for 3 months, another is persistently looking for a new job and moving to a different state to move in with her boyfriend, another is in the process of buying a house with her boyfriend, my mom is retiring at the end of the year, my brother is desperately searching for a job, and all this is coupled with the fact that my birthday is in 2 weeks. My quarter century birthday. My big two five. Sheesh I am old. Actually, I think that is exactly it. I am starting to feel old by what everyone back home is doing. I have no job, (no real job at least) no plans, no house, no career path, no idea what in the hell I am going to do. My friends mean-while are buying houses, getting married, have 401K’s and are fully vested. Anyone who knows me knows my biggest fear is to end up old and alone. (Although I think that is a big fear of most people). I am afraid if I keep going the way I am, before I know it, I will wake up and be 45 with 20 cats and be known to the kids in the neighborhood as Crazy Lady Janowitz with overgrown weeds in the yards, and an ominous looking old house. No thanks.
I think this blog is written by the irrational side of my brain. The rational part of me knows that 25 is young, and I have plenty of time to buy a house, find a career I love, get married, have a “real” life. However, I think the irrational side of my brain is currently on steroids and is beating out the skinny weak rational side.
(Side note: I have a huge urge to use the word “reckon”. Please don’t think I am a red neck by using this term. Over here it is synonymous with “think”. I hear it about 34328320948 times a day, and my vocabulary is slightly altering into aussie lingo the longer I am here. Maybe it really is time to get out of here).
Back to the point. I found a job here, (waitress) and hopefully once I start to occupy my time with work, meet new people, and have some money in my bank account I will start to feel better. I am still enjoying living with Cooper, and I have a lot of fun with his friends, but I miss MY friends. His family is super sweet, but once again they are HIS family. I miss MY family.
It is pretty ironic that transitions are tough for me. On one hand I thrive with transition. ie: traveling for 6 months on my own. However on the other hand, as soon as I get some stability I freeze up and get anxiety. Most people love stability, but as soon as I get any in my life I want to leave it behind, yet while I leave it behind, all I want is for it to come back into my life. I currently have a house, a job, friends, and a good life, yet what I want is to travel again, or go back to my old life. When traveling I want to stop and lay low. When I am in the states I want to go oversees. Life is a bitch ain’t it??? Why does the grass have to be so damn green on the other side? Why ca’nt all the grass be the same exact shade of green everywhere and in every situation.
I realize many people are going to read this, and say, “Sarah, why are you complaining??” You are in Australia, doing something I wish I had the courage to do.” Well it’s true. I really don’t have anything to complain about, yet I am. I apologize for my complaints, but I think we have all been in a situation where we have felt home sick. So a little sympathy would be nice ☺
It is winter here now, and I wonder if the reason why I miss home is because it is rainy and cold, while it is approaching sunny days back home. My tan is gone, which is an altogether depressing thought. Especially considering how hard I have worked on that tan.
Anyhow- Life all in all isn’t so bad. I know I can come home whenever I want, but that brings me to the question of the last blog. Where is home?? Ay yai yai!!!!
Alright I think that is about it from me for today. I have a family dinner at the Cooper’s house tonight.
To leave on a light hearted note: Two days ago I went on a run around town (SO out of shape it is frightening). Anyhow- I saw a homeless man standing up and peeing all over the sidewalk with his penis out for the world to see. So not only is there white trash in Australia, there are also stinky homeless men, even in some of the nicest areas of Australia. Aren’t you pleased to know that we are all connected on the most primal levels??
The last time I wrote, I spoke about home. I spoke of how, for the time being, I was finally home. I spoke about how I was so glad to have stopped moving and to be settled. I think the saying that applies best to my life at this exact moment is “the grass is always greener”. You always want what you don’t have. It’s actually quite annoying don’t you think?
Now that I am settled, I miss home. This time around I am qualifying home as the USA, NYC, Hoboken, NH, Maine, etc. Now that I have stopped moving, I have all the time in the world to think about the pleasures of home. When I was moving around every few days, I was far too busy to have time to think about anything more than what city I would be in next and how I was getting there, never-mind to think about home. There was no time to think about my family, my friends, and what was going on in their lives. Now that I have been in Adelaide for what is approaching 3 weeks on Thursday, I have felt very, very home sick.
I think this feeling of missing home is only increased by the fact that many of my friends have had life altering things happen in the last few weeks. One friend from home got married a few weeks ago, and I missed her wedding, one friend got engaged last weekend, one friend had her company transfer her to London for 3 months, another is persistently looking for a new job and moving to a different state to move in with her boyfriend, another is in the process of buying a house with her boyfriend, my mom is retiring at the end of the year, my brother is desperately searching for a job, and all this is coupled with the fact that my birthday is in 2 weeks. My quarter century birthday. My big two five. Sheesh I am old. Actually, I think that is exactly it. I am starting to feel old by what everyone back home is doing. I have no job, (no real job at least) no plans, no house, no career path, no idea what in the hell I am going to do. My friends mean-while are buying houses, getting married, have 401K’s and are fully vested. Anyone who knows me knows my biggest fear is to end up old and alone. (Although I think that is a big fear of most people). I am afraid if I keep going the way I am, before I know it, I will wake up and be 45 with 20 cats and be known to the kids in the neighborhood as Crazy Lady Janowitz with overgrown weeds in the yards, and an ominous looking old house. No thanks.
I think this blog is written by the irrational side of my brain. The rational part of me knows that 25 is young, and I have plenty of time to buy a house, find a career I love, get married, have a “real” life. However, I think the irrational side of my brain is currently on steroids and is beating out the skinny weak rational side.
(Side note: I have a huge urge to use the word “reckon”. Please don’t think I am a red neck by using this term. Over here it is synonymous with “think”. I hear it about 34328320948 times a day, and my vocabulary is slightly altering into aussie lingo the longer I am here. Maybe it really is time to get out of here).
Back to the point. I found a job here, (waitress) and hopefully once I start to occupy my time with work, meet new people, and have some money in my bank account I will start to feel better. I am still enjoying living with Cooper, and I have a lot of fun with his friends, but I miss MY friends. His family is super sweet, but once again they are HIS family. I miss MY family.
It is pretty ironic that transitions are tough for me. On one hand I thrive with transition. ie: traveling for 6 months on my own. However on the other hand, as soon as I get some stability I freeze up and get anxiety. Most people love stability, but as soon as I get any in my life I want to leave it behind, yet while I leave it behind, all I want is for it to come back into my life. I currently have a house, a job, friends, and a good life, yet what I want is to travel again, or go back to my old life. When traveling I want to stop and lay low. When I am in the states I want to go oversees. Life is a bitch ain’t it??? Why does the grass have to be so damn green on the other side? Why ca’nt all the grass be the same exact shade of green everywhere and in every situation.
I realize many people are going to read this, and say, “Sarah, why are you complaining??” You are in Australia, doing something I wish I had the courage to do.” Well it’s true. I really don’t have anything to complain about, yet I am. I apologize for my complaints, but I think we have all been in a situation where we have felt home sick. So a little sympathy would be nice ☺
It is winter here now, and I wonder if the reason why I miss home is because it is rainy and cold, while it is approaching sunny days back home. My tan is gone, which is an altogether depressing thought. Especially considering how hard I have worked on that tan.
Anyhow- Life all in all isn’t so bad. I know I can come home whenever I want, but that brings me to the question of the last blog. Where is home?? Ay yai yai!!!!
Alright I think that is about it from me for today. I have a family dinner at the Cooper’s house tonight.
To leave on a light hearted note: Two days ago I went on a run around town (SO out of shape it is frightening). Anyhow- I saw a homeless man standing up and peeing all over the sidewalk with his penis out for the world to see. So not only is there white trash in Australia, there are also stinky homeless men, even in some of the nicest areas of Australia. Aren’t you pleased to know that we are all connected on the most primal levels??
Sunday, May 3, 2009
Home Sweet Home
Don't get excited, I'm not "home" or coming "home" any time soon. But I am "home" for the time being. In fact while talking about "home", what exactly does that mean these days? People keep asking me when I am heading home. And I truly dont really know where home is anymore. I mean, in the last 8 years I have lived in 3 different states, and 7 different cities. That is a LOT of moving around. So where exactly is "home"? I still think it is the United States, but is it NH? Maine? NYC? Los Angles? or somewhere that I haven't even lived yet? All I know is at the moment "home" is Adelaide Australia.
I am officially settled into Andrew's house. I have a key, I have a dresser (albeit sitting in the ikea box waiting to be built) and I have a bed on the way. I have a scooter at my disposal, I have a library card, and all I need is a job. It was nice to come back to Adelaide. It is a familiar city and I'm glad to be here. However, if I don't find a job soon I'll be in trouble. I wonder if working the corner is illegal here??? hmmm...
The last couple weeks have been great. After I arrived in Alice Springs I went on a 3 day trip to Uluru, Kings Cannon, and the surrounding area. I know Uluru is supposed to be this magnificent spiritual place, but honestly it is just a massive rock in the middle of some flat lands. I was MUCH MUCH more impressed with Kings Canon. It was really quite beautiful and the views were gorgeous, On the 3 day trip we once again camped out in swags underneath the stars. Although unlike the Kakadu's it was absolutely freezing at night. I was bundled with every item of warm clothing I owned, in a sleeping bag, and swag, and scarf, in order to sleep. brrr. I think it got down to about 8-10 degrees Celsius. I'm glad I made it to the outback and saw the nothingness of the area, but Uluru really wasn't all that impressive. Sorry Australia, but I think driving though Utah is just, if not more spectacular.
I then went to Sydney for 36 hours to get a bag I left there, and return a bag to my friend China. After my short Sydney stint I was off again to Adelaide. I got here early on thurs morning and am fully engaged in a job search. I am starting off looking for something in my previous field of Commercial Production. Ill see if I can get a gig with a company who loves me and wants to sponsor me. But if nothing comes up in the next 2 weeks Ill lower my goals and try to get a job waiting tables. Hopefully someone will want to hire an american girl. I have an interview thingy tomorrow morning at 9am with the CEO of a small boutique agency here. He said there are no positions available, but the e-mail I sent to him intrigued him and he would be willing to chat. Maybe he knows someone. I guess we will find out. That means today I have to go and buy a pair of pants and some shoes. I don't think my holed jeans, and flip-flops will impress too much. Everything I own has turned into a light brown color. Everything has gotten beyond ruined. Good thing I didn't bring out nice clothes. However I need some more clean wife beaters in white and black. I seem to LIVE in them day and night and can't find them here. So if anyone feels the need to send out a care package you can get me fruit of the loom, mens small wife beaters. hint hint. :) You can purchase them at Target and they come in 3-4 in a pack for like $8. Im more than happy to send my mailing address along to anyone who wants it. Haha.
It is the start of winter here, and has been quite chilly at night. I am losing my tan, (VERY upset about this) but I am happy to be wearing jeans and not profusely sweating while just standing doing nothing. However, I wouldn't mind it being beach weather to enjoy the outdoors a bit. I went to my first Australian Rules Football match on Saturday. Well actually I went to two. In the morning I went to Andrews game, learned the rules and got my bearings. His team won by like a million points. And, the eye candy on the filed wasn't too bad either. That night I went to the professional teams game. It was the local rivalry of the Adelaide Crows, vs. the Port Adelaide Power. Seeing as how I am living with a HUGE crows fan, and his family was the one who gave me my tix I figure it would only be right to be a crows fan myself. (Although the Power's colors are much prettier. Who doesn't love turquoise??) It was really fun to watch the game. AFL is similar to rugby, and american football, and soccer all mixed into one. Rough sport, but fun to watch. The Crows lost pretty terribly, but it was still a great night!
That about sums up my last couple of weeks. This blog was kinda all over the place. But I am happy to report that I am Home for now, and enjoying not moving every two days. I have my shampoo in the shower, and my toothbrush by the sink. I have a dresser to put clothes in and I can look forward to not living out of a bag for a while! phew!
I am officially settled into Andrew's house. I have a key, I have a dresser (albeit sitting in the ikea box waiting to be built) and I have a bed on the way. I have a scooter at my disposal, I have a library card, and all I need is a job. It was nice to come back to Adelaide. It is a familiar city and I'm glad to be here. However, if I don't find a job soon I'll be in trouble. I wonder if working the corner is illegal here??? hmmm...
The last couple weeks have been great. After I arrived in Alice Springs I went on a 3 day trip to Uluru, Kings Cannon, and the surrounding area. I know Uluru is supposed to be this magnificent spiritual place, but honestly it is just a massive rock in the middle of some flat lands. I was MUCH MUCH more impressed with Kings Canon. It was really quite beautiful and the views were gorgeous, On the 3 day trip we once again camped out in swags underneath the stars. Although unlike the Kakadu's it was absolutely freezing at night. I was bundled with every item of warm clothing I owned, in a sleeping bag, and swag, and scarf, in order to sleep. brrr. I think it got down to about 8-10 degrees Celsius. I'm glad I made it to the outback and saw the nothingness of the area, but Uluru really wasn't all that impressive. Sorry Australia, but I think driving though Utah is just, if not more spectacular.
I then went to Sydney for 36 hours to get a bag I left there, and return a bag to my friend China. After my short Sydney stint I was off again to Adelaide. I got here early on thurs morning and am fully engaged in a job search. I am starting off looking for something in my previous field of Commercial Production. Ill see if I can get a gig with a company who loves me and wants to sponsor me. But if nothing comes up in the next 2 weeks Ill lower my goals and try to get a job waiting tables. Hopefully someone will want to hire an american girl. I have an interview thingy tomorrow morning at 9am with the CEO of a small boutique agency here. He said there are no positions available, but the e-mail I sent to him intrigued him and he would be willing to chat. Maybe he knows someone. I guess we will find out. That means today I have to go and buy a pair of pants and some shoes. I don't think my holed jeans, and flip-flops will impress too much. Everything I own has turned into a light brown color. Everything has gotten beyond ruined. Good thing I didn't bring out nice clothes. However I need some more clean wife beaters in white and black. I seem to LIVE in them day and night and can't find them here. So if anyone feels the need to send out a care package you can get me fruit of the loom, mens small wife beaters. hint hint. :) You can purchase them at Target and they come in 3-4 in a pack for like $8. Im more than happy to send my mailing address along to anyone who wants it. Haha.
It is the start of winter here, and has been quite chilly at night. I am losing my tan, (VERY upset about this) but I am happy to be wearing jeans and not profusely sweating while just standing doing nothing. However, I wouldn't mind it being beach weather to enjoy the outdoors a bit. I went to my first Australian Rules Football match on Saturday. Well actually I went to two. In the morning I went to Andrews game, learned the rules and got my bearings. His team won by like a million points. And, the eye candy on the filed wasn't too bad either. That night I went to the professional teams game. It was the local rivalry of the Adelaide Crows, vs. the Port Adelaide Power. Seeing as how I am living with a HUGE crows fan, and his family was the one who gave me my tix I figure it would only be right to be a crows fan myself. (Although the Power's colors are much prettier. Who doesn't love turquoise??) It was really fun to watch the game. AFL is similar to rugby, and american football, and soccer all mixed into one. Rough sport, but fun to watch. The Crows lost pretty terribly, but it was still a great night!
That about sums up my last couple of weeks. This blog was kinda all over the place. But I am happy to report that I am Home for now, and enjoying not moving every two days. I have my shampoo in the shower, and my toothbrush by the sink. I have a dresser to put clothes in and I can look forward to not living out of a bag for a while! phew!
Friday, April 24, 2009
White trash exists even in Australia
I know, I know. Not the most PC title of a blog, however, I suppose the idea that “trash” exists everywhere in the world unites us all in a sense. No?? Is that a stretch?? Well regardless the title is true. White trash exists even in Australia. My idea of white trash used to be a Jerry Springer episode of an incestuous family from Louisiana beating each other up on screen for everyone who watches syndicated tv to watch. But this universal “trashy-ness” is now a concept that I know runs deep into the cosmos.
Let me remind you, I am a girl from NH, not exactly the most diverse state in the union. I went to Ithaca College in upstate NY, not exactly a place that breeds varied cultures. I lived in Hoboken NJ which is now Mr. and Mrs. White Bred USA. Being from these, I’ll admit, lucky, borderline upper-crust areas, “trash” seems to stick out like a sore thumb. I have seen this “trash” throughout my days, and once again I witnessed it on my 24 hour train ride from Darwin to Alice Springs.
CAUTION: this blog may be a bit mean spirited. So forget the image of the perfect daisy picking Sarah I know you all have in your minds, and replace it with Lucifer- Sarah for just this one entry, then you can all go back to your image of the true heavenly Sarah. Deal? Deal.
I get on the train at about half past nine in the morning, and after I find my seat and settle in I see a family of 5 saunter on. Two girls, one very over-weight with a baby in her arms, and one who looks like she rolled around in a pile of grease and then decided to eat the grease. AKA- also very overweight and really dirty. (In fact I’m not sure any of them had showered in a good week.) Behind them was a man, (clearly the dad, and granddad) and a teenage boy. With my luck they sit down directly next to me and in front of me. Once I got a good look at the baby, my initial reaction was: WOAH!!! That is one UGLY baby. (I know, I know I’m going to hell). To me babies are usually precious and idyllic but not this one.
We made a stop at a town called Katherine for 4 hours. There isn’t really anything to do in Katherine, so I decided to stay on the train and read, and watch a flick on my computer. The Grandfather also stayed on the train with the baby while his three kids went on a 4 hour meander though Katherine. As the angelic girl I really am, (just not in this entry) I decide to say hello. Who knew saying hello would open up such a can of worms?? Some people just need to vent even if it is to a perfect stranger who frankly doesn’t want to listen. Lucky me I got to be that un-wanting stranger. He told me that overweight daughter number one is the mother who is 15 years old. Her mother skipped out on her and the family when she was 3 and since then daughter number 1 was never the same. She left home at 12, got into “dope, and then that turned into needles and whatever else” to quote the dad. “She then started having sex, and now here is Phoebe.” Apparently he has never even met the father. Whoa dude!! I just wanted to be polite and say hello. He went on and on and on, and I just sat and listened because it really seemed as though he just needed to vent to anyone who would listen. His other two kids 17 and 13 as I came to find out were all pretty fucked up in their own ways. I actually felt really bad for this guy. By the way, this girl DID NOT look 15. 18 maybe 19, but NOT 15. I have always looked young for my age, but I’m pretty sure at 14 & 15 I still had no need for a bra, had baby teeth, and thought boys had cooties.
I couldn’t help but observe the family dynamics for the remainder of the trip. Daughter #1 really didn’t do shit for the one month old baby. The grandfather took care of her almost the entire time. I fell asleep to him holding her, and woke up to him holding her in the morning while the mother slept on a seat all to herself stretch marks out for the world to see. What can one expect from a 15 year old though?? I think I only learned to tie my own shoes at 13, and stopped having my parents cut up my food for me at 16. Having a baby at 15 wasn’t even a possibility. Truly sad.
Anyhow- I got off the train at Alice Springs 24 hours later counting my lucky stars that my mom didn’t run off on me when I was 3, and wondering how this 15 year old could ever care for a baby. However my last thought as I got off the train, was “I really hope this baby grows out of her ugly stage”. Eek.
Let me remind you, I am a girl from NH, not exactly the most diverse state in the union. I went to Ithaca College in upstate NY, not exactly a place that breeds varied cultures. I lived in Hoboken NJ which is now Mr. and Mrs. White Bred USA. Being from these, I’ll admit, lucky, borderline upper-crust areas, “trash” seems to stick out like a sore thumb. I have seen this “trash” throughout my days, and once again I witnessed it on my 24 hour train ride from Darwin to Alice Springs.
CAUTION: this blog may be a bit mean spirited. So forget the image of the perfect daisy picking Sarah I know you all have in your minds, and replace it with Lucifer- Sarah for just this one entry, then you can all go back to your image of the true heavenly Sarah. Deal? Deal.
I get on the train at about half past nine in the morning, and after I find my seat and settle in I see a family of 5 saunter on. Two girls, one very over-weight with a baby in her arms, and one who looks like she rolled around in a pile of grease and then decided to eat the grease. AKA- also very overweight and really dirty. (In fact I’m not sure any of them had showered in a good week.) Behind them was a man, (clearly the dad, and granddad) and a teenage boy. With my luck they sit down directly next to me and in front of me. Once I got a good look at the baby, my initial reaction was: WOAH!!! That is one UGLY baby. (I know, I know I’m going to hell). To me babies are usually precious and idyllic but not this one.
We made a stop at a town called Katherine for 4 hours. There isn’t really anything to do in Katherine, so I decided to stay on the train and read, and watch a flick on my computer. The Grandfather also stayed on the train with the baby while his three kids went on a 4 hour meander though Katherine. As the angelic girl I really am, (just not in this entry) I decide to say hello. Who knew saying hello would open up such a can of worms?? Some people just need to vent even if it is to a perfect stranger who frankly doesn’t want to listen. Lucky me I got to be that un-wanting stranger. He told me that overweight daughter number one is the mother who is 15 years old. Her mother skipped out on her and the family when she was 3 and since then daughter number 1 was never the same. She left home at 12, got into “dope, and then that turned into needles and whatever else” to quote the dad. “She then started having sex, and now here is Phoebe.” Apparently he has never even met the father. Whoa dude!! I just wanted to be polite and say hello. He went on and on and on, and I just sat and listened because it really seemed as though he just needed to vent to anyone who would listen. His other two kids 17 and 13 as I came to find out were all pretty fucked up in their own ways. I actually felt really bad for this guy. By the way, this girl DID NOT look 15. 18 maybe 19, but NOT 15. I have always looked young for my age, but I’m pretty sure at 14 & 15 I still had no need for a bra, had baby teeth, and thought boys had cooties.
I couldn’t help but observe the family dynamics for the remainder of the trip. Daughter #1 really didn’t do shit for the one month old baby. The grandfather took care of her almost the entire time. I fell asleep to him holding her, and woke up to him holding her in the morning while the mother slept on a seat all to herself stretch marks out for the world to see. What can one expect from a 15 year old though?? I think I only learned to tie my own shoes at 13, and stopped having my parents cut up my food for me at 16. Having a baby at 15 wasn’t even a possibility. Truly sad.
Anyhow- I got off the train at Alice Springs 24 hours later counting my lucky stars that my mom didn’t run off on me when I was 3, and wondering how this 15 year old could ever care for a baby. However my last thought as I got off the train, was “I really hope this baby grows out of her ugly stage”. Eek.
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